About

I’m so glad you’re here.

For most of my life I had a stone in my shoe. Not big enough to stop me walking. Just there.

I’m a counsellor and an educator, but that’s not really where this comes from. What I found wasn’t a problem to fix. It was information I’d been ignoring. That’s the work I do now with other women.

Where it started

I learned early to stay inside what was acceptable.

I was a big character as a child. I noticed everything and I said so. I was shut up a lot, by teachers and at home, and I learned early that expressing myself fully was not safe.

So I did the right things. I qualified as a Chartered Accountant in London and I ran businesses that did well.

Mine was earning my worth through what I achieved. Keep busy, keep proving, keep going.

A really good life

I have had a really good life, and I want to be clear about that, because nothing here is a story about something going wrong.

But accounting was never what I wanted to do. I had always wanted to work with people.

Those rules are very good at sounding like your own voice.

Finding the work

That was the thing.

Later I studied again and became a high school teacher, and I loved working with young people. Then I trained as a counsellor.

The first time I sat with a woman and we got underneath what she was really carrying, I knew. That was what I had been circling my whole working life.

The space

Not a different life. A truer one.

It took my children leaving for me to stop long enough to hear it properly. I had been the busy one for years. Mother, wife, friend, daughter.

Around the same time I heard Bronnie Ware, who wrote about the regrets of the dying. The one at the top was not having had the courage to live a life true to yourself. I sat there and thought, oh no. That is me.

I could have filled the space back up. Instead I leant into it.

The stone was never the problem. Avoiding it is. The moment you stop judging it and actually look, you don’t fall apart. You expand.

These days my life is full in a different way. Time for hobbies, my health, family and friends, creating the podcast, and working with women as they find their own stone.

More joy. More love. More of me actually in it.